IS LIFE PASSING US BY?

In response to requests from friends who had missed the recent launch of The Senior magazine at Petrosains KLCC (21 Feb, 2017), I am sharng the slides from my talk on 'Active Ageing'. Here's the first slide (above), and a question for the audience - Do you agree retirement is the best time to enjoy life?

The response would depend very much on whether we have laid the foundation for a successful retirement. If the roots of a sapling do not get enough of the right nutrients, the sapling will not grow into a strong and sturdy tree that will withstand the vagaries of the weather.

Likewise, for our retirement years to be truly golden, we must ensure these six pillars (roots) are firm enough to buttress us against the challenges of our later years. The six pillars: good health, financial security, strong relationships with our family and friends, community service, a belief system to keep us grounded, and lifelong learning to help us grow and improve.

If we do not have all six pillars in place, or if some of these pillars are weak, we need to shore them up. Insufficient savings? Work on a plan to generate some income or cut back on spending. Too old to do the things we have always wanted to do? Says who? Age is just a number that Time has given us. It does not define who we are, or what we want to be. We are the drivers controling the steering wheel of our lives.

Retire from work, but do not retire from life. Live life to the fullest or see it pass us by. The march of time seems merciless as we enter our later years. It is as if the countdown has begun as soon as we hit our 70s, never mind the research studies that show a sharp rise in the number of centenarians worldwide. Do we want to make each moment count, and fill it with happy experiences? Or do we want to withdraw from family, friends and the world outside, and fill our days with regret and remorse, and all the bitterness of a life that could have been. What a sheer waste of precious moments as the clock ticks away.

So get rid of the doldrums and go out. Feel the sunshine and the breeze on your skin. Take time to smell the roses, play with your grandchildren. Recharge. Be grateful that you can get up in the morning to greet another new day. Growing old is a privilege denied to many.

Have fun, travel, explore, discover. This is the time to spend on yourself. Be selfish. The above photo is one of my all-time favorites taken at Gardens by the Bay, Singapore in May 2015. A total of 40 members from SeniorsAloud and U3A (KL and Sgor) went on this 3D2N trip. There was so much to see, do and learn. A truly diverse group of Malaysian seniors spending a fun weekend together.

No need for us to look across the oceans for an inspiring role model of graceful ageing. Right here on our shores we have our former PM's wife, YB Toh Puan Dr Siti Hasmah, 91, to show us how we should live life in our retirement years. We are never too old to pick up new skills. All it takes is a change of mindset and attitude. The world is our oyster if we let it be.

One of the biggest fears of growing old is loneliness and abandonment. This comes from the perception that older people are useless and unproductive. Harbouring such thoughts and feelings can lead to depression, and in some cases, to suicidal tendencies in the elderly. The best way to dispel such negative thoughts and pessimism is to be active. An idle mind is the devil's workshop, right? Join a seniors club or volunteer with an NGO that resonates with you. For a start, why not sign up for courses with University of the Third Age (U3A)? Not only will you widen your circle of friends, you will also enjoy the fun of learning new skills with your peers in a non-threatening environment, without the stress of exams and homework!

The ladies above signed up for U3A acrylic painting course as beginners. They soon discovered they had a flair for painting. The result - an acrylic art exhibition of their masterpieces held in Putrajaya. Goes to show that we are never too old to learn new skills, never too late to unearth our potential. Think of the sense of pride and achievement these ladies must have felt. We can all be like them. Take the initiative to explore new horizons. Be fearless. Never let our age stop us from trying new things that interest us.

When we spend our retirement years living a sedentary lifestyle, our muscles will soon atrophy. We will start complaining of aches and pains all over. And before we even reach our 70s, we become dependent on all kinds of aids, from walking aids to hearing aids and every other aid in between. It's time to get up from our favourite lazy chair and exercise. Don't fancy exercising on your own? Round up some friends for a qigong session, or join a group like Mrs Jagjeet's Nordic Walkers.

There are also groups that organize hiking-camping-cycling trips. Take your pick. Go google, or search Facebook to find out where these groups meet and how you can join them. Making resolutions to lose weight, eat well and exercise regularly produces no results. Translate your resolutions and good intentions into the right action to see results.

Nothing like spending time outdoors in the early mornings or late evenings doing exercises to keep fit. Here are some members of Malaysian Healthy Ageing Society (MHAS) brisk walking in Taman Jaya park a few Sundays ago. In another section of the park was a group of old friends enjoying a quiet board game. Good friends provide a strong support system in our old age. Cherish their friendship.

Don't fancy the physical demands of hiking or cycling? Take up gardening. Mowing the grass, raking dry leaves, carrying flower pots and weeding all help to strengthen our muscles and improve our flexibility. There's also the added joy of eating the fruits of your hard work if you have a garden of fruits, herbs or vegetables. Urban farming is gaining popularity among city residents. U3A also offers short courses on hydroponics, kitchen garden and mushroom cultivation.

Not only should we take care of our physical health, but also our mental health. Use it or lose it applies to our brain as well. Board games are great as mental exercises, so are doing crossword puzzles, sudoku and playing mahjong. All these help us to maintain our mental acuity and hopefully keep Alzheimer's at bay. Here are members of SeniorsAloud enjoying a mentally-stimulating game of Math Magic. The board game was invented by Malaysian Jimmy Yeoh.

The ladies of senior citizens clubs love to dance. We just wish the guys shared the same interest. No matter, as long as the ladies are having fun, the guys are content to sit and watch. Dancing is an enjoyable way to exercise the body. It is liberating as well. The above photo was taken at SeniorsAloud 'Golden Memories' dinner and dance in 2015.

Passion and Compassion - these two values have been at the core of SeniorsAloud's existence from its very beginning in May 2008. Working hard to extend SeniorsAloud's reach and promote an active lifestyle for seniors has become my passion. I am blessed to have a dedicated team of volunteers to support me for our events and projects. Our passion spills over into compassion for others that need a helping hand. We believe firmly that volunteerism adds meaning and purpose to life. There are so many ways we can contribute to community service. Just find the one you are comfortable with, and that works best for you.

For SeniorsAloud we have chosen to help by setting up a small initiative to look into appeals for assistance from the elderly or from NGOs that serve the elderly. Here are some of our past community service efforts made possible with funds raised at our annual dinners.

Given the platform to speak on active ageing to an audience of senior citizens, I could not pass up the opportunity to promote SeniorsAloud and U3A at the launch. I have been told these are the most active senior citizens groups on social media in Malaysia, and possibly in the region. So it should be easy for anyone interested to get in touch with SeniorsAloud or U3A to join their activities. Just google.

These are the 20 slides from my 30-min talk, with some added notes. If you qould like to know more about any of the groups mentioned here, contact SeniorsAloud. We are committed to promoting active living for senior citizens, and will put you in touch with the respective groups.

Delivering my slide presentation on 'Active Ageing' at the launch of The Senior magazine at Petrosains KLCC on 21 Feb 2017. 

(Update on 21 Feb 2021: The Senior Magazine published by Third Age Media is available at major bookstores.)

PUTTING THE FUN BACK IN LEARNING AT U3A

(This post is specially for our blog visitors and SeniorsAloud community members who do not have a Facebook account and do not want to sign up for one.)

Many SeniorsAloud members are also members of University of the Third Age (Malaysia), better known as U3A (M) for short. We have been enjoying the short courses at U3A for several years now, and we look forward to signing up for more courses each new semester. The next semester begins this Saturday, 30 August 2014. Details below.

First, a bit of background about U3A

The University of the Third Age began in France in 1973 at the Faculty of Social Sciences, Toulouse. The model became popular as it made sense to utilize the facilities and staff of the university to conduct the short courses offered by U3A. But the catalyst for the rapid growth of U3A was the phenomenal rise in the ageing population in Europe, the United States and Asia. Today there are U3As all over the world, even in Russia!

The term 'Third Age' refers to the 'golden years' after retirement when older adults are able to enjoy freedom from work to pursue their interests. As the retirement age varies from country to country, the Third Age could begin anywhere from 55 to 65.

The original model has undergone changes to adapt to the changing times. In the UK, many U3As are not linked to universities. They operate like focus groups consisting of members that share common interests. They meet regularly at the home of either a member or the instructor to listen to talks or share on certain topics of interest. The atmosphere is always informal, friendly and supportive.

Most U3As are self-funding and autonomous. Courses are usually of short duration and skills-based. Language courses are also popular. The underlying philosophy of U3As is to make lifelong learning fun and accessible to older adults everywhere. It is about enriching our golden years, and that includes making new friends and enjoying new experiences.

In response to older adults who are unable to attend U3A classes or meetings for one reason or another, there are now online or virtual U3As in several countries. You can find out where they are and what courses they offer at http://www.u3aonline.org.au/.

University of the Third Age, Malaysia

Group photo taken after the certificate presentation ceremony

U3A Malaysia follows closely the original French model. It is associated with University Putra Malaysia through the Institute of Gerontology (IG), Faculty of Medicine and Health Sciences. It was set up in 2007 as a program under the "Lifelong Learning for Older Malaysians" project started by Prof. Dr. Tengku Aizan Hamid, Director of IG, and jointly supported by the Government of Malaysia and the United Nations Population Fund. In 2010, U3A Kuala Lumpur and Selangor was officially registered with the Registry of Societies (ROS) Malaysia.

Courses

U3A(M) offers an average of 40 short courses per semester, ranging from languages and skills to health and adult development. There are two semesters a year, commencing in March and in September. Courses run for 4-6 weeks. Most classes are of two hours duration and held weekly at IG. A few are held at Hulu Langat Community College, and at Auditorium JPA, Putrajaya. The certificate presentation ceremony is held in December. Those who have completed their courses receive a certificate and enjoy a celebratory lunch with their fellow course-mates.

Fee Structure

While anyone aged 50 and above is welcomed to sign up for courses, U3A encourages those interested to register for membership as they can enjoy more benefits. For new members, there is a one-time registration fee of RM15 (inclusive of RM5 membership card). Annual fee is RM25. Members pay only RM80 for any three courses. Each additional course is RM30. Non-members pay RM50 per course. Do consider signing up for life membership as you pay only RM150 and you can avoid the hassle of renewing your membership every year. Members also get to enjoy outings and various events throughout the year.

This is how the fee structure works:

So, are you eager to embark on a journey of lifelong learning with your fellow Malaysians? Then be there on Orientation Day.

If you have an FB account, please visit U3A FB page at https://www.facebook.com/U3AMalaysia for more info and photos of U3A events and activities. For enquiries, you can send an email to u3aklsel@gmail.com or info@seniorsaloud.com.

TO WORK OR NOT TO WORK AFTER 65? DO WE REALLY HAVE A CHOICE?

Who in their right mind would want to continue working upon reaching retirement age? After spending the best years of our lives working hard for others just so we can feed the family, most of us can't wait to clock out for good.

No more daily stress of a 9-5 job. The sheer joy of waking up late, and spending the rest of the day doing what we like. Time is our own, and we can finally withdraw all our savings from the EPF/CPF to spend as we like.

Life can't possibly be better than this. No wonder the retirement years are aptly called the golden years.

Yet, in a simple survey carried out by the Straits Times recently, 70% of the 50 workers aged 55+ said they would want to keep on working.

Straits Times, 3 May 2014

A good friend of mine is a strong advocate of full retirement after 55. He feels that retirees should not seek re-employment. They should just enjoy life to the full. For many that would mean playing golf, travelling, picking up new hobbies and spending time with the family.

Sure, we all deserve the good life upon retirement, don't we? But sad to say, many of us, especially those from the middle income bracket, can't afford to simply stop working. What happens when the pay check stops coming in? Who will take care of the bills for utilities? Who will pay for our children's postgraduate studies? Who will foot our elderly parents' medical expenses? Who will keep up with the mortgage payments and the insurance premiums?

And what about the rising cost of food and fuel? Inflation eats into whatever little savings we have.

We may live longer now thanks to better healthcare and advances in medicine, but longevity can be a bane for those who do not have adequate savings to support 15-20 years of retirement.

It's a growing worldwide trend for older workers to seek re-employment after retirement.

If your company offers to re-employ you in a different capacity, or extend your contract after you have reached retirement age, would you accept the offer?

I bet the answer for many of us is YES. We really don't have much of a choice.

You might want to read the following related article:

WORK BEYOND 65? WHY NOT?

WHEN PARENTS GIVE AWAY THEIR MONEY TOO EARLY

(Several friends have forwarded this article to me in the past week. I take it they want me to share it here on the blog. In the article, first published in the Philippine Star, an online network for the global Filipino community, Letty Jacinto-Lopez offers advice that I think parents with adult children should pay heed to. I have taken the liberty of adding some images.)

At their 54th anniversary, my friends made a decision to distribute their combined assets among their living heirs. Their rationale, “Para walang gulo.” (To avoid trouble). They added one proviso: “While still alive, income from these properties will be used to maintain our present lifestyle inclusive of medical expenses, extravagant trips and unlimited shopping.”

 “That’s easy,” replied the heirs. The income was substantial to indulge the old folks with a bonus that the heirs can use in any manner they wanted.

The first year passed without a hitch, but soon the problem surfaced. Each child used all kinds of tactics to keep the money from his parents. It reached a point where the poor retirees had to beg for sustenance, robbing them of the dignity they worked hard to uphold.

What went wrong?

 “Bad decision,” said a cautious friend who warned the couple of this scenario. “Children are so unreliable when it comes to inherited money.”

Money received, which was not expected and not a direct result of something they worked for, is not given the same value as money earned with their own sweat and tears. They lose their sense of propriety; gratitude is tainted by greed and decency gone. This is compounded by in-laws who can tilt or convince their respective spouses to throw out good sense and filial affection like soiled rugs, “Honey, they’re going to die anyway, so why waste good money on them?”

To avoid falling into this vulnerable, pitiful state, keep these 10 tips in mind:

1. Do not retire. If you’re over-aged, retire and get all the benefits but find another income-generating job or open a business that will keep you active physically and mentally. Travel and bond with true friends, play a sport, learn a new hobby and volunteer in your community or parish. Don’t loaf around. Your spouse will hate you because you’ve become a sloppy, listless bum with nothing good to say about the household and things that you never bothered about before. Solve crossword puzzles, play Scrabble, write your memoirs, and above all, read — this will keep you alert and keep Alzheimer’s at bay.

2. Live in your own place to enjoy independence, privacy and a solo life. If you move in with your children, your rank or degree of importance is reduced to that of a bed spacer who has no place of honor or, worse, like crumbling furniture merely displayed with no added value. Might you kowtow to conform to their own rules that are not kind, considerate or mindful of you? If you witness your children engaged in a war of will and wits with your grandchildren, whom will you side with? Will they even appreciate your arbitration? Remind your children that silence is not a sign of weakness; you are merely processing data that is taking longer to complete.

3. Hold on to your nest egg, bank deposits and assets. If you want to help your children, do give, but not to the extent that you wipe out your life’s earnings, singing heroically “not a shirt on my back nor a penny to my name.” Staying solvent and in the black is a good hedge against all kinds of tempests. You will sleep better, you will not be afraid to express your opinion and you will be confident about yourself.

4. Don’t believe your children’s promise to care for you when you grow old. Priorities change. Many children are not guilt-ridden or filled with a sense of moral obligation when the wife and offspring take top billing in their lives. There are still children who would consider it a privilege to show compassion, genuine love and deep concern for their parents but be warned that not all children think alike.

An inter-generational percussion session

5. Expand your circle of friends to include young ones who will definitely outlive your old BFFs. Keep up with new inventions, trends, music and lifestyle including all the scams and schemes you should guard against. Remember that when you mix with the young, you also open a fresh avenue to channel your thoughts, experiences and values through so that the lessons you learned are not lost, forgotten or buried with you.

6. Be well groomed and smelling fresh of spring water all the time. There’s nothing more depressing than seeing people exhale when you walk by because you reek of baul (camphor chest) or lupa (dirt). Old age or bust, don’t look and smell like a corpse when you’re not one yet.

7. Do not meddle in the life of your children. If they ask for your counsel, give it, but be ready to accept that they may not take it. Their situations in life cannot be compared to the situations that you experienced in your life. The playing field has changed and they need to develop their own set of survival skills. If you raised them to be street smart, they can handle themselves in tough situations and be able to read people.  Champion and encourage their dreams and desires but on their own terms.

8. Do not use old age as your shield and justification for turning grumpy. There’s nothing more annoying than an arrogant, old fool.  Welcome each day as another chance to be kind and forgiving, to yourself and to others.

9. Listen to what others may say. Do not throw your weight around just because you are a septuagenarian or a nonagenarian. You are not a depository of knowledge. Even if the roles have been reversed, make growing old a fun-filled, pleasant experience for you and your brood.

10. Pray always and focus on your eternal life. You will definitely leave everything behind, a final journey detached from burden and care. Be more accepting that, sooner, not later, you will croak. Prepare your swan song with a humble and contrite heart. If you believe in a merciful and loving God, there is no need to strut like a star. Nobody is.

Here are more articles on the same topic if you are interested. Click on the links to read.

DO'S AND DON'TS FOR RETIREMENT

A PEACOCK TODAY, A FEATHER-DUSTER TOMORROW

"THERE SHOULD BE NO RETIREMENT AGE"

That's what Lee Kuan Yew, 86, Singapore's former PM and now MM (Minister Mentor) proposed in his speech two days ago at a function celebrating the 30th anniversary of the Singapore National Employers Federation (SNEF).

From 2012, Singapore employers have to offer re-employment to workers when they reach the retirement age of 62.

Here is what LKY has to say about retirement and reemployment.

"You work as long as you can work and you will be healthier and happier for it. If you ask me to stop working all of a sudden, I think I'll just shrivel up, face the wall and just that..."

"At my age, I may have aches and pains but I can keep going."

"Many of our workers have a preferred retirement, and then they die early! If you start saying, 'Oh, I'm old!' And you start reading novels and playing golf or playing chess or scrabbles, well, you're on the way down."

"The Chinese saying says 'You live long, you learn long'. Never stop learning. The day you stop learning, that's the day you begin to die, atrophy, and I'm still learning."

Sound advice from an elder statesman who is living proof that lifelong learning and purposeful living are hallmarks of longevity.

To view a video clip of excepts from LKY's speech, click here

Related article:
LEE KUAN YEW ON AGEING

OPT FOR BRIDGE EMPLOYMENT BEFORE FULL RETIREMENT

Full retirement may not be all that fun and fancy-free.

I learned a new term recently – “bridge employment”. This refers to the part-time work that prospective retirees should consider moving into as a sort of transition before moving into full retirement. Studies show that bridge employment, especially if it is related to one’s area of expertise, contributes to lower rates of major diseases like high blood pressure, heart disease, diabetes and arthritis.

These findings were reported in the Journal of Occupational Health Psychology last month. A sampling of 12,189 workers in the US in the 51-61 age group were surveyed every two years over a period of six years. Not only were these "bridge employees" in better physical health, they also had fewer mental health problems compared with their counterparts who went straight into full retirement.

Secret Recipe hires senior citizens.

However, the study revealed that bridge employment in an unfamiliar field of work did not yield similar health benefits. This could be due to the stress of learning new skills or adapting to a new job position.

It is not surprising that many people who have reached retirement age accept their company's offer to extend their employment on a yearly contract basis. Not everyone can handle the sudden switch from being gainfully employed to doing nothing day in and day out. Besides, not everyone can afford to retire fully.

Teaching has always been my passion. Although I 'officially' retired in 2004, I'm still in touch with education through my part-time work as a university tutor and through the workshops I conduct for teachers. I suppose that qualifies me as a semi-retiree in bridge employment.

That's me giving a talk at MPH, MidValley.

The message is clear: Don't slow down completely upon your retirement. Ease gradually into it by staying physically and mentally active. Get a part-time job that interests you, learn a new skill, or volunteer for community service.