ANNIVERSARIES AND REUNIONS - TO GO OR NOT TO GO?

The Star. Click here to read the write-up.

Once you hit your 60s and 70s, birthday parties take on a new significance. With each passing year, you mark the special day with a silent prayer. You thank God that you are still around to celebrate the occasion with your loved ones, and attend the 65th birthday of an old schoolmate.

You know that not all of your friends have made it through each year. Some have passed on without saying goodbye. Some are bedridden in nursing homes. You have visited a few in hospital, and you have seen the pain and suffering they go through as they battle sickness and poor health. Not all can count their blessings.

You know that life is precious. So are old friends, especially those you have been to school or college with. You were young then, so were they. Those shared memories are forever etched in your heart. For who will laugh at your silly teenage pranks and escapades except for those who were there with you?

This photo was taken in March 1970 in Wellington at a friendly soccer match. Pictured here are Malaysian students from Victoria University. Click here to read more.

Why then do so many who have retired turn down invitations to school anniversaries and class reunions? Why is there this reluctance to meet up with old friends? My school's 103th anniversary is coming up. As is the case in past years, I know I'll be one of only a handful of ex-colleagues who will turn up. What about the others? Here's the usual response:

The ladies:

~ No transport. Not sure how to get there.
~ Not free. Have something on the same night.
~ I've changed so much - old and fat now. Shy to go.
~ I have to babysit my grandchildren.
~ My husband doesn't want to go with me, and I don't want to go on my own.

The men:

~ It's too far for me to drive. The traffic's is really bad.
~ I don't see well at night. I'm also not sure of the way.
~ It's mostly ladies. Very few men will turn up.
~ I can't miss the ManU-Arsenal match on TV.
~ It's not free? You mean I have to pay?

People who are not keen on something will always come up with endless excuses. And they just can't be persuaded. Reunions are anthema to them.

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Reunions can be a whole lot of fun, as my cousin Henry will tell you. Back in June 2008, he organized a class reunion for his buddies who had attended Victoria University, Wellington, in the 1960s. The event turned out to be such a roaring success that he and his team are planning an even bigger one scheduled for September 2012, and opening it to anyone who studied in Wellington in the 1960s and 1970s.

If you are a Wellington alumnus, do check out Henry's Wellington Alumni website. It's packed with reunion photos and details of the next reunion. Who knows you might even find a long-lost buddy there! There's also a Facebook page, if you are interested to join the group.