Thursday, January 15, 2026

NEW YEAR, NEW BEGINNINGS

 

It’s easy to say that age is just a number but when faced with the reality of our reflection in the mirror, we can’t help but feel a tinge of sadness and regret. — GRACE WILLIAM


Another new year has begun. Another year older for all of us. While the young eagerly look forward to a year full of possibilities, the old wish they could slow down the merciless march of time.

It’s easy to say that age is just a number but when faced with the reality of our reflection in the mirror, we can’t help but feel a tinge of sadness and regret. Can’t we slow down time? Can’t the hours stretch a bit longer? Can’t the earth spin a little slower?

A friend remarked this morning in our chat group that it’s quite depressing for seniors to be reminded that we will be one year older, and one step closer to kicking the bucket.

It’s true Baby Boomers are looking much younger than their age these days. After all, 60 is the new 40, they say, thanks in part to cosmetic aids and medical advances.

However, there are certain parts of the body that reveal our real age, that no amount of clever cosmetic tricks will cover up for long. Let’s leave aside surgical procedures that enhance one’s physical appearance. After all, how many of us have the financial resources to go down that expensive route to looking “youthful”?

This tongue-in-cheek post is dedicated to those among us to whom “60 is the new 40” does NOT apply. We look our age, and for some, even older than our age!

Facing the hard truth

Ageing doesn’t arrive all at once. It settles gradually into different parts of the body, sometimes so subtly we barely notice. While these changes are natural and deeply individual, some areas tend to reflect age more clearly than others. This list looks at 10 body parts that often reveal how time leaves its mark.

1. Face

No prizes if you got this right. The lines on our face tell the truth – that we are no spring chicks. More like autumn turkeys if you know what I mean. The lines reveal our age just like the rings on a tree tell how long it has been around.

2. Knees and elbows

From years of wear and tear, the skin covering these joints resemble the roughness and toughness of elephant skin or alligator skin. Take your pick.

3. Skin

Like the migratory birds that fly south during the winter months, our skin goes south too. Unfortunately for us, it is a permanent southward migration. In old age, our skin loses its elasticity and literally “hangs loose”.

4. Eyes

From “dreamy eyes” to “droopy eyes”. If only we could iron out those laughter lines or “crows feet” that surface each time we laugh out loud. No wonder we seldom see older women react to jokes no matter how hilarious!

5. Neck

Now you know why older women wear scarves or opt for clothes with a high collar despite the discomfort in our hot weather. The dreaded “turkey neck” syndrome afflicts all of us, sooner or later.

Our wrinkled, gnarled hands are often a dead giveaway of our age. — Pexels

6. Hands

There is no way we can hide our wrinkled, gnarled hands. They are a dead giveaway of our age. When my grandson was four, he was fascinated by the folds on my hands and kept trying to see if he could smoothen them out!

7. Hair

Not only does our hair turn grey, silver, white, it goes into free-fall whenever we brush it. The horror of removing clumps of hair from the hair brush and from the bathroom floor. See a senior man wearing a cap, you can bet he’s hiding a bald patch.

8. Teeth

The number dwindles with advancing age. Only solution – dentures or implants. That explains why most older folks prefer soft foods, and why they avoid showing teeth when they smile.

9. Breasts

This affects women more than men. No longer firm and perky, the breasts now swing freely and resemble a certain elongated fruit – papaya. Padded bras are the cheaper alternative for those who can’t afford breast implants or dread surgery of any kind.

10. Private parts

This body part in older men spends more time hanging down than pointing up. No amount of massage or Tongkat Ali will revive it to its former glory. Fortunately, there’s the little blue pill – a life-saver for grandpas that still want some action.

Look beyond the signs of ageing

Depressing, isn’t it? We miss how we used to look. No wonder many of us avoid looking in the mirror, especially a full-length one. The years do take a toll on our body.

If we look at ourselves in the mirror when we wake up on the first day of the new year, and especially on the morning of our birthday each year, if all we see are sagging skin and greying hair or a bald patch, no wonder we feel depressed.

The secret is to switch our focus, to look beyond, or deep inside that reflection in the mirror. We will see that youthful, playful spirit still dwelling within all of us. Try it. I have, and I can tell you it works!

Growing old is natural and inevitable. So why fight it or try to reverse it? We should look at our wrinkles as life-lines of experience, and our greying hair as threads of wisdom.

Begin each day with a smile at ourselves in the mirror. Say “Hi” to that person smiling back at us. Not only does smiling make us look younger, it also brightens up our day. No need for Botox fillers or cosmetic surgery. Share that smile with the people we come into contact with during the day.

Or would we rather wake up grouchy and whining about our aches and pains, and complaining about how the world owes us our happiness? Do we want to spend the whole day spreading misery to those around us, and looking for people to wallow in self-pity with? What an utter waste of precious time! No wonder we are poor company for our friends and grandchildren!

And we wonder why young people see us as decrepit old fogies ready to crumble into dust or ashes any minute. That’s how many of us see ourselves too. Is that why we avoid looking at the mirror unless we have our make-up on? A smile works much better than cosmetics – it lifts up our face instantly and pushes back the years.

Let’s focus on our many blessings. We should be grateful we can wake up to greet each new dawn and enjoy each beautiful sunset. As is often said, growing old is a privilege denied to many. This is so true as we all know of friends who have left us way too soon.

Looking great has a lot to do with feeling great. It’s more important to remain young at heart and in spirit than looking young in appearance. A truly loving spouse or friend will see beyond the external and look deep into that beauty of soul and spirit that still reside inside all of us. We must continue to nurture that inner youthfulness and keep it forever young.

It’s really up to us, isn’t it, how we want to live each day, each year. Let’s not smile only for the camera. Let’s have a smile in our hearts too. Smile more and spread smiles as we welcome another new year.

Lily Fu is a gerontologist who advocates for seniors. She is the founder of SeniorsAloud, an online platform for seniors to connect and enjoy social activities for ageing well. The views expressed here are entirely the writer’s own.

(The above article was first published in the print edition on Wed 14 Jan 2026. It is accessible HERE.)

Saturday, December 27, 2025

MY ETERNAL GRATITUDE TO MY ROLE MODEL - TERESA HSU


Teresa with adopted son Sharana Rao

The first time I met Singapore’s supercentenarian, Teresa Hsu, was on Oct 20, 2008, a day after attending the MIM- RAMLEAN life enrichment programme. I had just spent four days from 16-19 Oct with 32 senior citizens ranging from 50 to 70 years of age. We were all looking to discover meaning and purpose in our sunset years, and here was a 110-year old woman who had already found her calling early in life.

Teresa had been invited by YPO (Malaysia Chapter) for a dialogue session on “Healthy at 110”. 110 and still actively involved in community work and traveling around to give motivational talks. How does she do it? I most certainly wanted to find out from her.

My daughter, Belle, with Teresa after the talk.

I was half expecting to see a frail, wrinkly old lady with fading eyesight and hearing loss. When I finally met her, I was completely bowled over by her clarity of vision, her infectious laughter, her natural wit and her mental agility. She could have easily passed for 40 years younger.

Teresa’s life story makes for fascinating reading. Born in 1898 in Guangdong, China, she has lived in three different centuries and seen more than she wanted of the horrors of war, hunger, poverty and disease.

(Image: Singapore Remembers)

From the age of four, Teresa learned to make herself useful with a broom. Her world was one of constant sweeping, cleaning and doing housework. She was deprived of an education in China where only males were allowed to attend school. But when her family moved to Penang in 1927, she managed to persuade the nuns at the convent where she was working as a cleaner to let her study with the children. Four years later, she passed her Senior Cambridge. With that under her belt, she left for Hongkong, and later Chongqing to work as a stenographer and bookkeeper with a German news agency.

In 1937, she quit her job and volunteered to help the injured soldiers during the Sino-Japanese War. When World War Two broke out, Teresa was once again witness to the suffering of the sick and wounded. Determined to learn nursing so that she could better help those in need of medical attention, she left for London in 1947. Despite being overaged at 47, her sincerity and dedication helped her gain acceptance into the Royal Free Hospital where she developed her nursing skills over the next eight years.

While in London, she joined the International Voluntary Service for Peace and travelled around Europe to help the needy and promote peace. Hearing about her willingness to serve in return for food and lodging, Bruderhof, a German charity group, invited Teresa to work with German Jewish refugees in hospitals and homes in Paraguay. She was to remain there for the next eight years.

Teresa and her volunteers dishing out food for the poor
and hungry. (Image: Singapore Remembers).
.
In her mid-50s, Teresa returned to Malaysia to see her ailing mother. While there she also helped her brother start the Assunta Foundation in Ipoh. She later went on to establish three homes for the elderly and two homes for young girls and the neglected, all in Ipoh.

In 1961, Teresa went to live with her older sister, Ursula, in Singapore. Seeing how devoted Teresa was to helping the less fortunate, Ursula bought a piece of land with her savings from her work as principal of the Convent for the Holy Infant Jesus in Bukit Timah. There Teresa started Singapore’s first Home for the Aged Sick in 1965 at the age of 67.

(Image: Wikipedia)

In 1970, with the increase in the number of inmates and the lack of funds to keep the Home running, the sisters signed over the deeds of the Home to the Rotary Club which then took over the management of the Home. It was renamed Society for the Aged Sick. Teresa stayed on as matron till 1980 when she was asked to retire at age 83.

(Image: Wikipedia)

Not one to settle for passive retirement, Teresa started the Heart-to-Heart Service with her co-worker Sharana Yao from her sparsely-furnished house next to the Society for the Aged Sick. Today she remains actively involved in the weekly distribution of food and provisions to the elderly in need.


A keen practitioner of life-long learning, Teresa continues to expand her knowledge by reading and learning new skills. She has a collection of more than 2000 books all donated, and is currently reading the Bhagavad-Gita for the eighth time. It’s incredible that at her age she reads without the aid of glasses. At 69, she learned yoga and has incorporated it into her daily rituals. At 90, she embraced Buddhism. At 100, she picked up Mandarin and now speaks it fluently. She also speaks Malay, French, German, Spanish and four Chinese dialects. At present, Teresa is busy learning Sanskrit.

When asked about her longevity, Teresa attributes it to a spartan lifestyle, a vegetarian diet, healthy habits, and a positive outlook on life.

Some quotable quotes from Teresa:

"I never harbor negative thoughts as this will distract my focus in getting on with life and work."

“There are no naughty children – only naughty parents.”

“When you greet people with a smile, people will feel happy and smile back. If you pull a long face, people will not feel happy and pull a long face back at you.”

“Crying wastes tissue paper, and cuts down trees. It’s better to laugh.”

“If you see someone fall, you do not ask him why he did not see the stone. You help him up and ask him to be more careful next time.”

“If I’m married, I make only one man happy. If I’m not married, I make many people happy.”

“The answers are not from me. They are just out there.”

“The world is my home, all living beings are my brothers and sisters, selfless service is my religion.”

“I prefer to laugh than to weep. Those people who cry to me, I say is your body full of water? I always tell them it is better to laugh than to use tissue paper, as laughing is free but tissue paper costs five cents. 'Ha ha ha' costs no cents.”

“If I stay at home, I just ha-ha to myself. If I go out and ha-ha with 20 people, I make 20 people happy.”

“I don’t give. Giving means I have and you don’t have. I share – I share all I have, except ice cream and durians!”

“The whole world is one big family. All human beings are related to me. We may not have the same surname, but we share the same universal surname – human beings. And that’s good enough for me.”

“What do I think about death? I don’t know. I haven’t been there yet. Have you?”

"No one has ever explained religion or spirituality satisfactorily to me. My religion is my conscience, and my conscience guides me."

“If you think old, you are old. If you think young, you are young. Even when you are 100+, you can still do a lot.”

“Why am I a vegetarian? Do you want to cause pain for your pleasure? Ask yourself that, and you won’t dare to put a knife to their (animals and fish) throat.”

Over the years, Teresa has received numerous accolades in recognition of her humanitarian work. But she remains humble, preferring to shift focus from herself to her work at Heart-to-Heart Service.


Teresa was delighted with the pen Belle gave her.

My daughter, Belle, and I recently spent one whole morning with Teresa and Sharana in Singapore. Teresa graciously welcomed us into her home and even sang a jolly German song and a traditional Cantonese nursery rhyme to entertain us! Teresa enjoys laughing and we had plenty of it that morning.

She was delighted when Belle gave her a pen from an Anthony Robbins seminar she had attended. Teresa amazed us when she proudly read aloud the small inscription "Living is Giving". No need for eye glasses. "I like that," she said simply of both the pen and the inscription.

Later, we joined Teresa and Sharana on their weekly visit to distribute provisions to some elderly ladies in Chinatown. It was a truly enriching and inspiring experience for us to be in Teresa's company and listen to her words of humour and wisdom.


Teresa distributing essential items to the elderly in Chinatown. (Pic: Lily)

Teresa is proof that it really doesn’t take much to live a long, happy, healthy and fulfilling life. As for Teresa herself, she says, “I hope to live till 250! In this world, there are still many poor people who need help from others. I can't leave too soon!"

Teresa loves to read. Here she's browsing
Eckhart Tolle's "The Power of Now". (Pic: Belle)

May you enjoy double happiness and double longevity, Sister Teresa!


POSTSCRIPT: The above article has been updated and revised from the original written in December 2008. My daughter Belle and I developed a friendship with Teresa till she passed on in December 2011. Our three years with her were fulfilling ones for all of us. Belle helped to make her wish come true - she had wanted to visit her nursing school in the UK one more time. Belle was able to secure a business class return air ticket from Singapore Airlines for Teresa. She accompanied Teresa and Sharana for the entire visit.

Like a little girl flying her first kite. A picture of pure joy!

The above photo taken by Belle remains one of my all-time faviurite photo of Teresa. She was eager to try new experiences like flying this beautiful kite. Belle also invited her to watch the night Grand Prix from the hotel where we were staying. On another occasion we introduced her to Anthony Robbins and his wife Sage. They were in Singapore for their 'Unleash the Power Within' event.

Anthony Robbins was honoured to meet Teresa.
(Pic: Belle)

Camera shy. Visiting Teresa at her home.

I have been asked countless times in interviews and by friends what made me start SeniorsAloud, who my role model is, and what drives my purpose in life. This is my reply below.

I started SeniorsAloud blog in May 2008. Blogging was popular then. Facebook was in its early years. It was tough going and a challenge for me to carry on as I was also recovering from a major operation in June. I was ready to give up my plan of starting a seniors community. It was destiny that a few months later in October, I met Teresa. She became my inspiration, and has remained my role model to this day.

On looking back over the years, I owe Teresa my inner strength, my passion in serving the elderly, and my continuing journey in active living and lifelong learning.